Plastic Electric 'Blog

4:14 AM

Singular 'They'

While looking for something on the grammar of abbreviated plurals, I came across some stuff to do with the use of 'they', 'their' and 'them' as singular pronouns in English (as in 'if a person think's that's wrong, then their position is probably untenable'). This anti-pedantry page seems to quite nicely summarise why singular 'their' ain't no bad thing. (Found via the Geneseo Online Writing Guide, found via this document about mistakes in philosophy papers.)

For at least a while, I've been quite happy using 'they', 'their' and 'them' as singular pronouns. It's a lot easier than things like 's/he', 'his or her', or 'him/her', and usually doesn't even need to be thought about. Plus it also conveys the sense of indefiniteness appropriate to whatever it is that's being said.

For quite some time I've held the view (as, I understand, do most lexicographers these days) that dictionaries are not there to prescribe spelling and definition, but are there to describe such things. After all, language came before dictionaries and lexicographers, so it really did have to start with people in general prescribing what should be in dictionaries.

Seems to me it's a matter of consensus. The general consensus for how words are spelt, and what words mean, and, of course, what the grammar actually is, seems to be a sensible thing to go by. If you say or write something in a particular language, and you want it to be correctly understood by others, it's good to speak or write according to the conventions used by people generally, don't you think?

Now, if dictionaries, and other books about language use, are written with the aim of describing the language as generally used in actual practice, then they can be very handy things for checking up on what the consensus for something is! That, I think, is the value in going by dictionary spellings and dictionary definitions (which aren't then really definitions, as such (at least, not in the prescriptive sense)).

But if someone reckons that 'they', etc, must be plural, then I would suggest to them that the plurality comes via the indefiniteness that leads to the use of such pronouns.

For example, would you say, 'If either Bob, Bill, Brian or Benny looks in the fridge, he will find a nasty surprise'? Does that sound right? Doesn't sound quite right to me! What about 'If either Bob, Bill, Brian or Benny look in the cooker, they fill find something even more gruesome'? (Note I also changed 'looks' to 'look'.) Doesn't that sound better?

Now, if I say 'A student should pick up a copy of the lecture notes before they go to the lab session', I'm not referring to a particular student. As with the example above, who 'they' refers to is indefinite, and any plurality in it comes from the plurality of people to whom the thing applies. Do you catch my drift?

I first got thinking about using 'they', etc, in singular fashion several years ago. This was inspired by things like 's/he', and 'his or her', in order not to be 'sexist' (as, it seems, the use of indefinite 'him' and 'her' in biologically gender-neutral senses seems to be disputed these days (after all, there's very little linguistic gender stuff left in English)). Most such attempts to be explicitly unsexist seemed clunky, and anyway, how do you pronounce 's/he'? So, it just seemed that 'they', and the like, were as good as anything. (And I also found myself sometimes saying 'themself', too!)

I am now quite convinced that trying to invent ways to use indefinite pronouns in unsexist ways, or just inventing new pronouns, is just not going to work. The Epicene Pronouns: A Chronology of the Word That Failed is the reason why I believe singular 'they' is really the best option.

4:53 AM

Curling Up in Agony

Over the years, I have had abdominal pains, due to crap diet (not literally a diet of excrement, though). My abdomen felt like it was trying to inflate beyond maximum capacity, and I'd begin to feel a rising pain. It would get more and more intense, leading me to wilt, to curl up in as comfortable a position as possible, wanting nothing but for it to just cease. At its worst, I didn't mind how it ceased. If I died, then and there, then that would be nice. Or just going to sleep, painless sleep.

I'd try to fart, to relieve the pressure, but rarely with success. But the pain would subside, and, wherever I was, I'd continue lying for a while, regaining my strength. It felt so nice when it eased off enough for me to just relax, rather than wilt. I'd lie there, on my bed, or on the bathroom floor, just recovering.

And, if I didn't succeed in having a dump, it would all happen again.

About twelve years ago, my girlfriend at the time once witnessed me having such discomfort. She said I was suffering period pain! Her description of period pain as being like having a fork stuck in your belly, twisting around, felt so appropriate. If it was a very large fork, that is.

I am reminded of this because Marybeth mentions the horrible pain that no man, no matter how sympathetic and wonderful he may be, will ever understand.. Okay, it wasn't period pain I was suffering, but it was certainly a pain in my abdomen that made me wilt and not mind dying, that made me curl up on the floor or wherever, trying to find a comfortable position that did not exist, doing a little bit of rolling around in agony, and which could last, on and off, for many hours. If, as I was told twelve years ago, it was how period pain feels, then I think I may have some understanding of what it's like. Minus having to expect it each month for many years. Minus hormonally based emotional accompaniments. Minus the bit about having blood coming out from between my legs for a few days. And minus some other things, too, no doubt.

But the physical pain - I think I know something of how that feels. Even though I'm a man.

Anyway, apart from not eating enough, my diet's a lot less crap these days. But I wonder what unhealthiness I would have to achieve to get an idea of what childbirth is like? Swallow a melon and pass it all the way through?

11:05 AM

Reflecting and Reviewing, but Really Wanting to Sleep

By an amazing twist of something or other, my aforementioned appointment has now been rescheduled for this afternoon. I could've gone to bed after all.

So, tired though I am, and yearning for sleep, I just can't go to bed. I did have a rest, for an hour or so, but didn't really sleep. Did start to dream a few times, but kept myself from truly succumbing by cunningly setting my mobile to do its alarm thing every ten minutes or so. Having to set its alarm thing again each time probably helped.

Looking at my tongue in the mirror this morning, I noticed that my health has declined a little recently. My tongue is matted, you see, and even has a little mohican running down the middle. But I'm still in quite a better state than I was, say, this time last year. It was a big mohican back then.

Pile of cigarette butts was keeping me too tempted to smoke. So, I've got rid of them. I've thrown them away. And I've put the box of nicotine gum in my pocket where my cigarettes used to go (wording it optimistically and positively). This means that when I reach for cigarettes, I'll end up with gum in my hand. In a box, that is. Not gooey gum, stickily covering my hand. No, I don't want that!

Something I've noticed when I haven't slept for fourteen hours or more is that I end up feeling increasingly normal. This is in relation to, say, how I generally was from, oh, 1994 to ... Well, to when? This time last year, I'd felt I'd made good progress, was pretty much recovered, and so on. But looking back, it looks to me like I was still quite some way from having truly recovered. So plagued by The Doubt (sort of insecurity and paranoia and stuff), and, even though I knew I was having to fend it off, I don't think I realised just how much I was affected by it.

These days, I'm feeling a bit wonky at times, a bit inept in some ways, but generally much more myself. But what about in, say, a year's time? Will I look back and think, 'Oh, I thought I was so much better by then, but really I was still in a bad way!' And feeling so much more 'normal' when I'm really tired doesn't help!

But I'm really tired, and I'm not sure this is really the best time for me to draw conclusions about how I am when I'm not tired. But, oh, I don't know. Maybe I just get too much sleep, and this skews things most of the time. Blagh.

Certainly there is the phenomenon of false recovery (but what's the proper term for it? Or is that the proper term?). Some people want to recover from illnesses in their heads so keenly that they see themselves to be recovering, or even recovered, when they're not. Or they can overrate the degree of recovery. Or they can go through the motions of having recovered, convincing themselves, and maybe others, that they've recovered, when really they've only managed to somehow contain whatever the illness is within themselves.

And, I s'pose, there can just be the plain old delusion of having recovered, simply out of the illness itself.

Anyway, I know that I've made real, genuine progress over the last year or so. I allow myself to have bad moods, to feel sad, to be hurt, to feel down, to be happy. It's a lot healthier, it seems, than trying not to be sad, or trying to avoid feeling shit. After all, just because depression can involve feeling down, it doesn't mean that occasionally feeling down means I'm still ill.

That, I think, is another thing where those keen to recover can have problems. Not wanting to be ill, any emotion that's similar to a symptom of the illness can be misinterpreted as being a manifestation of that illness, even when it's not. And I can conceive of that being combined with false recovery type stuff, too. Trying to resist potential symptoms of the illness, out of a desire not to be ill, just seems to impede recovery.

Blagh. I think I've run out of steam on that one. Not that I'd meant to get on that track, again. But I do like to reflect on and review such things, from time to time.

I could really do with sleep. Dare I have another rest? I think I may. Must make sure I don't oversleep, though. That would be terrible!

4:13 AM

Tired and Sleepy, But Must Not Sleep

Last night, I rather significantly overslept. Didn't actually have to get up for anything, but still. Got up around about four thirty in the afternoon. This is not good.

This is not good because I'm due to help the computer couple again in about five hours time. I just haven't had the tiredness or sleepiness to even attempt going to bed, but now it's got to the stage where if I go to bed now, I'll probably end up sleeping through them phoning and knocking at the door.

But I am tired, and sleepy, and I don't want to be dealing with computer problems, a computer illiterate man, and a computer novice, when in a sort of zombie-like state.

What I would do is set my computer to play a CD, nice and loud, at an appropriate time. But my CD drive is too crap now. Setting my mobile phone to wake me up's no good, either, 'cause I'll just sleep through it. Could set up an alarm clock, but I'm too good at incorporating them into my dreams. So, um, it looks like I'm going to have to hold out against the urge to sleep. How crap of me.

This actually feels a bit like being a student, again. You know, get into bad sleeping habits, staying up far too late, and getting up far too late, and then having to do an all-nighter to get that assignment done. I should have worked my way out of these diurnal/nocturnal cycles long ago, but I've been crap.

Well, I s'pose I could get on with a project I've suddenly decided to do. It's sort of a creative writing project, and one I thought of doing about a year ago. But I didn't feel like doing it at the time, and then forgot about it. But I remembered it over the weekend, and have got all excited about it! But I won't reveal details just yet. Anyway, I'm hardly an accomplished writer! (And I shouldn't start so many sentences with 'but'. Especially in quick succession.)

But I'm tired. Maybe I'll just go to bed and nap for a few hours. Except that's fatal, in that I'll just end up sleeing for twelve hours, and miss an opportunity to earn a bit more money. Besides, it's rude to miss an appointment just by sleeping.

3:44 PM

Where's SJ?

A few weeks ago (or thereabouts), SJ's blog, 'I, ASSHOLE', disappeared. But no worries, I thought, 'cause there's always Romanza!

But it seems rather quiet there. And I'm missing SJ's blogging. I'll even say I'm missing SJ. I just always feel I'm missing out a blog when I cycle through blogs to read.

So, where's SJ?...

3:33 PM

Asymptote

Isn't 'asymptote' a good word? I think it's a good word. And I think of it because I've just noticed that Mozilla is getting incredibly close to being finished, at long, long last. But will it be finished? It just seems that it only asymptotically approaches completion. See, I told you it was a good word.

3:24 PM

Low Sleepy

Went to bed far too late last night - and then couldn't get to sleep! Managed to get up for Sunday lunch, though. But, due to lack of sleep, I'm feeling low, sort of sad, and that sort of thing. Lack of sleep does that to me.

Yesterday, I was busily updating software on my computer, and have finally moved my email stuff from Netscape 4.crap (but swift) to Mozilla 0.9.9 (it was a RedHat update). This means I can now use it for more than one POP account! That's handy for when it comes to giving my email address to people who I'd rather not give my 'barsticus' email address to ('cause 'Barsticus', you see, is a hybrid of 'bastard' and 'Sparticus').

Still got another few hundred megabytes of updating to go, though.

5:20 PM

Not So Instant Messaging

Increasingly, I'm coming across mentionings of chatting on MSN. I feel kind of left out, even though there are other instant messaging systems. It probably doesn't actually make any real difference to me, but still, I feel kind of almost excluded.

But that's silly of me, 'cause I could just install Microsoft Windows on this PC, and join in the fun.

It's a matter of choice. People can choose to be Microsoft customers if they want. And, if someone (like me) doesn't want to be a Microsoft customer, they don't have to.

But all the same, I feel left out.

I'd really need to set up another computer for MS Windows, so that I don't have to keep switching between MS Windows and RedHat Linux. But I'd need another screen (and maybe a few other bits, but I think I've pretty much got everything I'd need). And anyway, I'd rather use the PC I'd use for that for something else.

I believe I can access MSN generally from this machine, but I very much doubt I'll be able to do any chatting. It's a safe bet that the chat client is MS Windows only. But even trying to access MSN using Opera seems problematic, as Microsoft only seem to support their own browsers, and Netscape's.

Now that's just daft. Why? 'Cause Microsoft is a member of the World Wide Web Consortium. What on earth is a member of the W3C doing having web stuff that excludes most browsers? It seems rather contradictory to me.

I've previouslywritten here about the IMPP Working Group, who are working on developing open standards for instant messaging systems. The idea is that it different IM systems ought to be interoperable, such that you don't need lots of difference IM thingies, one for each system, but can just use one for all. If all the IM service providers use such a standard, then there'll be no more needing specific operating systems just to participate. Hopefully.

Alas, it looks like it'll be a while before that work comes to fruition in the form of truly interoperable IM things. So, childish though this may be, I'll just keep on sulking.

5:43 PM

Oww, My Head Hurts

Went to the pub last night, but that's not why my head hurts. I only had one pint. And it was a pint of beer, not a pint of port, so it really can't be a hangover. I think it's just crapness.

Anyway, yesterday was a pretty busy day for me. (Except the morning, 'cause I just slept.)

Got collected by the people who I was helping with computer stuff (as mentioned last time), and we headed off to PC World. This was because Mrs Helpee (not her real name) had decided to buy a printer, and I was to be the technical consultant.

During the journey, she handed me an advert she'd taken from a paper, as she was interested in an economically priced printer on it. Alas, the printer had a USB connector, but her laptop's too old for that. So, even before we got to our destination, I was providing a useful service.

Lots of the printers there seemed to have USB connectors, rather than good ol' fashioned parallel ports. Not much good! But then Mr Helpee (not his real name, either, but they are married) came up with the bright idea of buying himself a new printer, as his laptop's only a few months old, and most certainly does have USB ports. His old printer had originally been used with the old laptop, so it could just be handed over to his wife, following in the old laptop's footsteps.

He settled on a nice, economically priced model, purchased it, and we returned to our home town.

Then I got to work, transferring the old printer (which was easy, 'cause that old laptop was still configured to use it), and made sure it worked (just to double check).

At that time, I was handed a nice mug of tea, and a slice of delicious cake. A very nice break! But not one I'd actually needed. A perk of the job, I'd say.

Anyway, then came the unpacking and setting up of the new printer. I diligently followed the instructions (remembering some rather annoying problems when trying to install another printer some months before), and all went swimmingly. Hooray!

So, with half an hour to spare, I put my teacher's hat on, and guided Mrs Helpee through the process of accessing her web email account. I think she finds it all rather fun, which helps a lot, 'cause it's so much easier to learn stuff and remember it when it's not just a boring chore. Didn't get to the point of actually sending and receiving any emails, though, but an email address was added to the address book, and a spam filter was activated. I think, though, as she tends to automatically read the stuff on web pages, she'll do fine.

One thing she had some noticeable difficulty with was the mouse. She's not used to mice at all. So, to give her some practice, I started up Solitaire (which is really called Patience, of course). It's a good way to get used to mice, so I hope she has fun with it!

I got paid another twenty quid for that afternoon's services. And I could certainly do with the money! So, I'm actually very grateful to them for turning to me for assistance. A very satisfying afternoon for all concerned, I think.

But that evening, I returned to their house. This was 'cause I was calling on the way to the pub, as Dr Andrew, their Medieval Historian son, was in town. Off we went to the pub, and talked about this and that. It was a good evening down the pub.

I should emphasize that there was no arse touching. This ain't Canberra, you know.

Anyway, after talking about work stuff (which in my case has to be about helping people with computers, and projects for which I'm not paid anything (yet)), the west end musical that's based on the music of Queen (how could they?), and other miscellaneous stuff, I enjoyed a pleasant walk home.

But that wasn't the end of my day! Because then I spent several hours online, updating some bits of my computer's operating system, and chatting and stuff. Oh, and also having to deal with my computer's console hanging, which forced me to take the unusually desperate measure (for Linux) of hitting the hardware reset button.

Finally got to bed way after four, and then slept too much. So, I've now got a (fading) headache.

But that's okay, 'cause yesterday was a good, good day.

1:01 AM

Computers, Computers, Tea and Cake

This week, I am mostly doing stuff with computers. (But that's nothing new.)

Yesterday (as in Tuesday), I helped a couple of people with their computer stuff. And I'm going back there tomorrow (as in today) to show one of them how to do email. I'm very glad that she actually finds it funny that she knows almost nothing about using computers - it's much better when it's a fun thing!

And I've also been trying to sort out the operating system updating stuff on my computer. But it's taken me many, many hours. I'll spare you the boring details.

Anyway, I'm quite looking forward to tomorrow. I'm sure I'm a crap teacher, but the way she keeps laughing about how she wants to learn how to send and receive emails from home tells me that it won't be a stressful time. Laughter is good like that.

Last time, I set up the computer (a laptop formerly used by her husband), and spend a few hours sorting up a dial-up account with a suitable ISP. This took a while, 'cause we (her husband and I) had to set up the account through his new laptop (he entered her personal details, while I did all the technical stuff). When I'd finally printed out the very convenient page of configuration settings, I returned to her laptop to set up the stuff by hand.

Took me quite a while, 'cause I had to learn some of the stuff to do with Outlook Express as I went along. And I wanted to be careful, 'cause I didn't want to screw things up. Checked things a few times, and I was satisfied that I'd done a good job. But it had taken a few hours, and it was too late to begin teaching my new pupil, so that's why I'm having to return. But I can partly blame the time it took on the oldness of the laptop. It dates back to the mid nineties.

I'm also looking forward to tea and cake. She buys these really good homemade cakes, made by genuine old biddies who sell them in the village hall once a week. They're gorgeous! And she makes excellent tea. She has some good techniques for really getting the flavour out of the tea bags - and I don't mean beating the little blighters to buggery with the tea spoon.

You see, the trick is that the water really does need to be very hot indeed. It's got to be as close to boiling as you can get it. The trouble is that when you pour boiling water into a cup, the cup cools it down enough to make a difference. What she does is she pours some boiling water into the cup first, to heat the cup up. Then, she throws the water away, and makes the cup of tea as normal. But with the cup now nicely hot, the water stays hotter, and it's worth it.

Anyway, I just hope I'm not too bad a teacher.

11:03 PM

Progress

Well, I feel I've been making good progress with my grammar description language project. And I feel I've been making some progress with creative writing. Plus I did three loads of laundry today.

Tomorrow, I'm going to help someone with his computer troubles. It's the same person who keeps asking me (and paying me) for assistance. This time, it's that his icons have moved across the desktop, on mass, and some have disappeared. And maybe some other things.

I've also been thinking philosophically a lot. I think this might have something to do with why I've ended up brain-tired a lot recently. Brains can use up a lot of resources, you know. Don't really have anything new to report here, on matters philosophical. Got some old things I could write, but I'm too tired right now. Despite getting up at one in the afternoon, I'm wanting sleep.

But I'm glad I'm making progress with things. It's good to feel I've been busy. Well, relatively.

12:41 PM

New Week's Resolution

Can't be bothered.

12:29 PM

And so I ended up going back to bed, and sleeping for another six hours. Finally got up just half an hour ago.

And I'm feeling subdued.

4:22 AM

Insomnia?

Just woke up about twenty minutes ago. That's just not enough sleep! Why have I woken up so early? Why couldn't I just turn over and go back to sleep? Why did I just suddenly feel too awake?

I hope it's not insomnia again. Not that I've ever had that much trouble with insomnia. It's just been occasionally, and related to nicotine patches. But I think it's something else this time. Maybe my body clock's just worn out.

Anyway, I know I'm going to be dead tired this afternoon.

9:59 PM

Minor Irritations

The other night, my brother did something that irritated me. It irritated me quite a lot. It irritated me more than it should've done.

You know how family members have these little ways that just irritate you? Things that normally wouldn't even be noticed, but, because they're family members, you can't help but notice them far too much? Well, it was one of those.

What he did was to put hand cream on his hands before going to bed.

This really irritated me! It always does. And there's really no reason for it, is there? I mean, it was hardly something that would interrupt me, or distract me from what I was doing (making toast). Yet, I could not help but be irritated.

And then my mind got going. I couldn't help but think of how my mother and brother will make a big deal (just occasionally, and not really that big a deal at all) about the adverse affects that winter weather seems to have on their hands. They rely on hand cream during such climatic conditions, and I'm sure they wouldn't be so susceptible to the weather if they didn't rely on hand cream. I'm sure it's mucked up their hands' natural mechanisms for coping with British weather.

You see? It gets me going. Quite needlessly.

Of course, I don't actually say anything. That would be silly. (Well, sometimes I've said something, you know, just suggesting that maybe hand cream might not be such a great idea, but to no avail.)

One of the things my mother does that irritates me is she stirs hot drinks in a particularly annoying way. Don't quite know how to describe it, but she stirs at an angle, sort of stirring in italics. Drives me up the wall! But if I react to it at all, she gets concerned that there's something wrong with me (and, perhaps, there is).

I'm sure I've got my own, irrationally irritating and annoying little ways, too. But, well, they haven't been brought to my attention. Oh, but there is one, and it's something my mother can't stand: hands being rubbed over each other. Every time I do that she protests! hehehe. Perhaps that's all I need to do when she stirs her drinks?

4:54 PM

Yawn!

Every day this week, I've ended up too tired before I've blogged anything here (well, except Monday). It's the vitamins, you see. The vitamins I didn't buy a few weeks ago, when I ran out. But I've got some more, now.

And there are other things I've ended up too tired before doing or finishing, such as catching up on blogs. I've just been so lethargic this week.

Wonder how long it'll take for the vits to kick in?

6:50 AM

Bloody Fucking Hell

I'm in a foul mood. Perhaps it's because I did reasonably well at not smoking yesterday (I usually seem to have a bout of depression within a few days of ceasing smoking). Maybe it's other stuff. Maybe it's a combination. But I don't feel depressed (which, I think, is a sign of long term improvement), I just feel annoyed.

I didn't wake up in a bad mood, but almost as soon as I'd got up, I started feeling crap. Soon, this was becoming a hacked offedness, and was turning into a bad mood. Being too annoyed to hold out against the urge to smoke, I went for a quick walk to get some cigarettes.

It's raining a bit, sort of steady, unheavy rain. The sort of rain from the sort of clouds that just says it could just carry on raining like that for as long as it wants, and that it doesn't want to do anything else.

My very cheap umbrella decided to turn inside out at the slightest breezes. Crap umbrella. Someone I knew came up with a really good solution over ten years ago. It got as far as patent pending, but the company that was to turn his invention into a real product went bust. That means that anyone can make use of his solution for free, but it doesn't seem to have caught on.

His solution, which sounds daft at first, was to cut holes in the umbrella, so that the wind could pass through without turning it inside out. Flaps over the holes kept the rain from coming through. It was an act of genius! It even got shown on BBC's Tomorrow's World (which has something of a reputation for featuring things that then don't make it into everyday life after all).

Anyway, my crap umbrella kept turning inside out, and that just added to my annoyance.

By the time I got back here, I was well and truly in a foul mood. Hacked off, annoyed, fed up.

Now I'm just finding all sorts of things to be annoyed about. Not little things, but big things. The fact that during my twenties I made apparently negative progress in my life, for example. The fact that I have no idea what the ultimate, eternal fate of people I care about is. The fact that spam exists. The catch-22 that I can't get a decent job without a decent CV, and it's damned difficult to get a decent CV without getting a decent job. The fact that I'm stuck in a duff, boring town.

That's not everything I'm hacked off about by a long shot (and, okay, I'm getting hacked off by little things, too). But I just can't list everything here.

And I feel like I've been a moron. I feel like I've been a moron with lots of things. I'm kicking myself about this and that. I'm annoyed with myself for making predictions of getting stuck in ruts true. I'm annoyed I let my degree get derailed. But I'm too annoyed, too wound up now, to do anything about my life right now. Too annoyed to concentrate on anything.

AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

5:29 AM

Blagh. I'm feeling rubbish today. Seems I'm not the only one feeling naff. Blagh.

7:11 AM

AAAAARGHHH!!! Blogger did post my previous entry after all. And, because I can't delete entries, I'm having to replace the duplicate entry with this. grrrrr.

5:42 AM

Resignation

Well, I've just resigned as a reviewer from The Weblog Review. Why? Was it a bust-up? Was it the stench of corruption? Was it 'cause I was caught stealing from the stationary cupboard?

No, it was none of those things. It was, in fact, completely unexciting. I just didn't see the point in reviewing blogs.

I can see the point of reviewing news commentary sites, and the sort of online diaries which are written to be read by strangers. But with the term 'blog' being more and more broadly applicable, and increasingly being a form of web page or website, rather than a matter of what the content specifically is, reviewing everything that constitutes a blog just seems a bit pointless.

It's a bit like reviewing message boards, simply because they're message boards. Or reviewing sites that use framesets. Well, perhaps blogs haven't become quite so generalised, yet, but I think it's heading that way. (After all, is a guestbook not itself a kind of blog?)

In particular, there are many personal blogs which really have their value in the roles they play in people's online social lives. Does it really make much sense to review such blogs? I don't think it does, 'cause the value of such blogs is in the context of online friendships, aquaintanceships (is that the right word?), etc.

Anyway, it was an interesting experience, although not a very long lasting one, and I'm glad I tried it out. Maybe it won't be something to add to my CV after all, but that doesn't matter. Perhaps if I'd stuck with it longer, I might've got into the reviewing groove. But I'm happy just to have tried it out.

Or, perhaps, blog reviewing would be more worthwhile if we (both reviewers and bloggers) took it less seriously, and just treated it as a bit of fun?

6:58 AM

It Doesn't Have to be Good to be Fun!

Back in the early '80s, there were things like ZX Spectrums, Commodore 64s, and so on. Some of us learned to program (badly) in various dialects of BASIC, and the adventurous (or nerdy) (like me) dared to learn assembly language programming.

Those were fun times, writing dreadful games, awful code, and wrestling with cassette tape loading errors. Not to mention arguing over who could get to use the TV.

But those times passed, and home computers became too complex for amateurs to just learn programming as they went along. Something of the fun of home computers had gone.

But then, in the early '90s, the web arrived! And, with HTML, we could start learning how to create our own websites (badly). Fun times again!

When I was still mucking about with Spectrums, I would be told various things by those who were older (but not by much) and wiser. They'd tell me to structure my code, not to leap out of the middle of loops, and other handy things. Spending ages specifying the software, and then designing it, all on paper, before beginning to write any code, just didn't appeal to me. But now, I know the value of such practices - and use up an awful lot of paper!

And with the web - who wants to spend ages learning about W3C recommendations? Who wants to invest time planning websites and stuff before even beginning to create any HTML documents or graphics? And so we end up with loads of sites that aren't really that well done, and many which are surprisingly badly done (even if they look good on some browsers).

But the standards nazi approach (which I'm strongly prone to take) does overlook a very important aspect of web stuff: it can be fun! Just like writing very dodgy code for crap games on Speccies and Commodores was fun, so is creating your own, personal website.

Unfortunately, I'm now too entrenched in trying to do things 'properly' to allow myself to do 'bad' mark-up (and the like) in order to get the effects I'd like. And I do tend to be of the opinion that good mark-up, planning and design, are good things to learn generally (if boring).

But the fun side of things shouldn't be overlooked. If someone doesn't want to learn to do it 'properly', then that's fine. And there's no reason why they shouldn't then create web pages for fun! It's like forming a band for fun, despite being crap at playing musical instruments, or having a go at squash despite being as sporty as, erm, a very unsporty person.

The bottom line is: if it's fun and it's only done for fun, regardless of whether or not standards have been followed, then all the applicable requirements have been fulfilled - it was for fun!

3:32 AM

Now that I've got both nicotine patches and gum, I'm really going to try, really try, not to smoke.

But I could do with some moral support.

3:25 AM

About a week and a half ago, Robyn blogged about a grammatical issue, and just the other day, suggested an amusing solution.

4:23 AM

Memory Errors

For some reason, I have a peculiar memory from one of my many childhood visits to Wales.

We were visiting one of my mother's friends, who lived on a farm. The farm was no longer operating as a farm, 'cause of some by-pass that had been built through it. But it was a nice place to go for a walk.

We walked to the end of the farm (thinking of the farm land as a giant back garden, 'cause I'm a townie). I can't remember much of it, except there was a lot of grass, and some electricity pylons. I know it was just my family walking, and we were talking as families do, though I can't remember what we talked about.

As we got towards the end, it became increasingly familiar. The end of the farm was the bottom of our back garden! We had, it seemed, found a route from somewhere in Wales to our own home, just outside London, that was basically some kind of short cut.

I can still remember seeing the tortoise pen as we approached. It's the one, vaguely vivid (if that's not a contradiction in terms) image I still have in my head. And all we needed to do was turn round, and there was our house (can't remember if we did that, though).

I was excited at the prospect of not needing to return to Wales, and come back home by train. But, as my father pointed out, our luggage was still in Wales, with all our clothes and stuff. We'd have to go back, via the farm, and return on the train after all. I was a little disappointed that we weren't going to get to use the short cut.

Quite possibly, it's just a dream. Or I'd got confused somehow. Or time has corrupted my memory. But wouldn't it be good if it was true?

1:11 AM

New Week's Resolution

Whoops! I forgot to write anything here yesterday. Nevermind, it was a bank holiday weekend. Not that I did anything.

Anyway, I was being rather feeble last week, and ended up resolving to be more resolute by now. Am I more resolute?

Well, I resolved to become a blog reviewer at The Weblog Review, and I did. Not that that's much of a resolution.

But what about this week? What target shall I set myself?

Having had a go at a bit of creative writing recently, I think I'll seek out a suitable, creative writing group on the web. Some group to do with short story writing, and that kind of thing, is what I want. A group which is suitable for beginners ('cause I feel like one ('cause I am one)). A group in which people give each other feedback, especially criticism, and that sort of thing.

And I'll aim to write a new short story by the end of this week.

5:12 AM

Oh, and I thought it might be good for me to make some distinctions, for clarification about what I'm not ranting about in the previous entry.

What I don't mean is stuff like:

• "Oh, we had a wonderful time! The group really gelled, and everyone got on like a house on fire."

• "It was interesting. I can't go into details, though, 'cause of reasons of confidentiality. It's part of how it works, and I'd rather not break such rules."

• "Roger and I had an interesting chat in the kitchen about, you know, personal stuff."

You get the idea? I was ranting about needlessly saying that something isn't going to be said, rather than, say, appropriately explaining why something can't be said that otherwise might be said, for example. It's needless 'there are things you're excluded from' rather than telling someone about something that they weren't able to attend but would've enjoyed. It's not, 'you're invited, even though you're too far away to make it,' but, 'you're not a local, so you don't get to join in.' You catch my drift?

Anyway, that was just my old rant for tonight. I have lots of old rants. Maybe I'll rant another one this week. I do like a good rant!

4:45 AM

An Old Passion

Ohhh, I hate it!

One particular aspect of cliquiness, that is. I can't stand it! It drives me up the wall. (And it's not too helpful that I'm capable of being really paranoid, too. Though paranoia hasn't really been a problem for a while. But even so, this one aspect of cliquiness that I hate so much could easily trigger it, if I was in a susceptible state. But even without paranoia susceptibility, I still really hate that one thing about cliquiness.)

A decade or so ago, some friends and I had ended up feeling that we were on the outside of a clique at church. We disliked it, but we generally didn't let it bother us. We just got on with our own stuff. And, disliking cliquiness, we had something of a policy of not excluding people. At one time, we were not infrequently going down the pub with quite an impressively sized group of people!

But there were times when, it seemed, we were regarded as being something of a clique ourselves. It hadn't been intentional, and seemed to be due to it just not occurring to us to invite along various people. The people we tended not to invite along were not just the members of the clique that had inspired our noncliquey policy, but others who felt even more rejected by that clique.

It was an interesting thing to learn, and being in a clique of friends got us to see it from both sides. We still sought, and, perhaps, sought more actively, not to be cliquey, but we learned something really good to know: cliques aren't necessarily deliberate, and they're not necessarily a bad thing. They can, it seems, be quite natural and normal, and even be just a matter of perception.

But one thing that I still hate to this day is when someone decides to be needlessly cliquey. Or, rather, unnecessarily make someone feel that they're not worthy to be part of the clique. Rejection, which many people really dislike and find hurtful, is probably a big part of it. And, I think, the needlessness of making someone feel they're 'stuck on the outside' is what really gives it a sharp, pointy, nasty tip.

Examples of the sort of thing I'm on about are things like:

• Inviting someone to a party, but not inviting someone else, even though they're standing right next to the person you're inviting. It's especially nasty if you've interrupted their conversation to do so.

• Telling someone about some activity, how good it was, and so on, that they could have been invited along to, but weren't, especially when they would have been able to participate.

• "Oh, we played a very interesting game! Can't really go into details, though. It's just for those who were there." Which, I think, is a particularly nasty and unnecessary kind of thing. You may as well say, 'Hey! I could tell you something really interesting that you'll really want to know, but I'm not going to.'

That last one, I think, where there's a deliberate attempt to inspire interest and curiousity, at the same time as saying that you're not going to know what the things actually are, is the one that really gets my goat the most. It's somewhat reminicent of children taunting, "This is our gang, and you're not part of it!" Oh I hate it!

Of course, it could be said (as I've heard said before) that I'm just being jealous of people who are in cliques that I'm not in. But that would just be the cherry on the cake, if it came from someone who was being unpleasantly cliquey in the first place. It would just convince me that they're being deliberately nasty. Even if their reason for doing so is to just enjoy belonging to a group themselves, there's just no need to enjoy it by making other people feel they're 'stuck on the outside', or 'don't belong', or whatever.

I hate this kind of thing with such a passion that I'm prone to misconstrue joke cliquiness for this kind of thing. The joke isn't necessarily even supposed to be joke cliquiness! It can be some other kind of joke, which just uses the notion of cliquiness as a vehicle. But even when I recognise such jokes for the fun jokes that they really are, I still dislike it. I just hate this one, needless aspect of cliquiness too much.

But it isn't even really an aspect of cliques. Cliques can exist quite happily without this sort of thing. It's something that shouldn't be made a part of cliques, but which gives the phenomenon of cliques a bad name.

Perhaps something about this thing I'm ranting about that really winds me up is how it creates something of a catch-22 situation. The 'outsider' can either just decide not to bother with those nasty, cliquey people anymore, which just means the nasty cliquers win, or... Well, what? What's the alternative? Just put up with it, despite disliking it. Carry on being an 'outsider', and continuing to be part of the context that means the clique is, indeed, a clique.

Yes, I think that's a big part of why I hate such stuff with such a passion.

But, I have to say, groups of friends, and the like, and people being in different, perhaps overlapping, but still distinct groups, is not a bad thing. It's just how things are. Enjoying cliquiness on the inside of a clique is no bad thing. It's nice to belong, to be part of something. It's just this one thing of needlessly making people on the outside feel they're somehow unworthy, or whatever, that I detest.

grrrrr.

10:27 PM

Anyone Fancy Becoming a Spam Baron?

We all know that spamming is no way to make money. It doesn't work. All it does is give the spammers a reputation for being sad, pathetic time-wasters.

Yet, just now, I got a piece of spam in which the spammer was trying to sell me bulk email lists. Perhaps spammers are getting so desperate that they're trying to sell spamming itself to people?

There is, perhaps, money to be made through spamming. It's like any gold rush, where the only people sure to make a profit are those selling the pick axes and shovels. But with spamming, it's email lists, automatic spamming software, and that kind of thing. There are so many pathetic suckers out there who still believe they can make money by spamming, that I'm not surprised there are parasites willing to sell them stuff to spam with. They're at least as much to blame for spam as the spammers themselves.

But maybe there's another kind of spamming. I can easily imagine legitimate businesses seeking to advertise on the internet. An unscrupulous advertiser could charge for advertising services, with big promises of vast exposure, only to go on to use automatic spamming software to supposedly fulfill those promises. If the customer finds out that what they paid for was spamming, and demands a refund, then the spammer just says, "Sorry, mate, if you'll read the contract, you'll see we fulfilled our side of it. We never said what form the advertising would take!"

Put those two theories of spamming together, and it looks even jucier for the spamming parasites. They promise advertising with great exposure at surprisingly low rates, and then sell bulk email lists and spamming software to the suckers who'll then actually do the spamming. With, of course, a promise of some sort of commission, but a commission that will never be paid, as no one will ever buy anything on the basis of spam.

Does that sound plausible? Could I, perhaps, become a spam baron?

8:22 PM

Grim Gum

Do you remember, at school, you'd feel under the desk, and there would be these small lumps that felt like dried putty, but would turn out to be dried chewing gum? Can you imagine what it would be like to pick off a bit and start chewing it?

Today, I bought some nicotine gum. The taste, for some reason, just reminds me of what it would be like to chew old gum from underneath school desks. It's revolting! There is a sort of minty hint, but definitely the predominant flavour is horrible. Fortunately, you only have to chew occasionally, and leave it sitting in your cheek most of the time. It's not nearly so bad that way.

I was also supposed to buy some more nicotine patches, but I forgot. I was also not supposed to buy cigarettes, but I was weak and crap.

But I am trying out the gum, now. I wonder who chewed it before me?

12:50 AM

Then again, having reread my last entry, it was about 10% of the total electorate who made the difference in the postal voting schemes. That suggests it's at least 10% of the electorate who are being lazy. Perhaps the remaining 55% or so have other reasons for not voting.

12:38 AM

Vote for Apathy!

We've just had the English local elections. After the whole Le Pen thing in France, I'd hoped there'd be good turn-outs this year. There weren't.

It wasn't a very interesting election, either locally or nationally. Except for the stuff to do with a monkey being elected mayor of one place, and the BNP winning three council seats in Burnley. (The BNP are basically facists who've tried to clean up their image.)

I sigh, because if all the people who didn't vote had actually bothered (or, at least, actively abstained, like I do sometimes, by going to the polling station and not voting), the results could have been so very different. Not that I necessarily wanted different results.

I'm now of the opinion that the majority of people are being lazy. This is because of the results of some trial schemes to try to increase turn-out.

In some places, the voting was done entirely by post. That, I gather, gave people a lot more time to vote. In some other places, electronic schemes were tried, as well as internet voting, and even voting using mobile phones!

Most such schemes failed to increase turn-out. Except the postal only voting, where turn-out increased by over a quarter of what it was generally. But still pretty low.

What that tells me is that many people are just being lazy. (I am a very lazy person, so I'm expertly qualified in such matters. But even I vote!) If it was the belief that voting makes no difference, how come so many more voted postally? Seems to me that many of the nonvoters will vote, but only at leisure.

But surely it's people's democratic right, at least in the UK, not to bother voting if they don't feel like it. Then again, is it not the case that I also have a democratic right to express what I think of it? I think, perhaps, we could sink into some kind of lax anarchy that way.

It is my opinion that politicians are nothing but members of the electorate who have decided to actively participate beyond just voting. Okay, that does lead to other, consequential distinctions, hence the general politician/voter distinction that seems to cover lots of more specific distinctions. But if people don't really like any of the existing politicians to choose from, then why aren't more of them getting actively involved and putting themselves forwards? Why aren't there more parties?

I believe laziness is a strong factor. If laziness wasn't the reason for low turn-out, then postal voting would have made little difference. And if laziness is such a strong factor that it's keeping people from even voting, then it's a pretty safe bet that it's also a major factor in why people are just leaving things pretty much as they are, politically.

But perhaps the low turn-out is a sign of general contentment. Perhaps people tend to regard politicians as being pretty good, generally, regardless of the party? That would be a pretty positive reason for people to not vote. But it just doesn't sound like that on the media. Perhaps the media are painting the wrong picture.

Anyway, it's good that the BNP only got three seats out of the 6000 or so on offer.

3:04 AM

4.0, 4.5, 4.0, 4.5, 1.5, 4.0...

Following the recent stuff about reviewing blogs, I have been accepted as a reviewer at The Weblog Review. Woo!

And I've already had my first review published! Hoo!

8:40 PM

Euphorians?

Someone, who happens to be Monkey's reviewer, seems to think I'm an euphorian. What is an euphorian? Fortunately, she provided a link.

Turns out to be a silly spoof of excessively woolly Political Correctness. I found it quite entertaining. I quite liked the hats.